Abandonment Trauma
Feeling abandoned can be caused by a trauma of neglect. It’s a trauma involving feeling alone, unsafe and insecure. It is especially traumatic if the abandonment event or neglect occurred early in childhood. Abandonment fear is the fear of a loved one leaving us. This fear stems from a significant loss, neglect or rejection. Some examples of childhood trauma are abuse, neglect, abandonment or environmental issues like poverty. Parents likely create uncomfortable and even dangerous/harmful situations for children, and those affect how children develop emotionally and attach to people.
Even If a child is abandoned early in life, abandonment can still exist years and decades after the traumatic event. People that have been abandoned are more likely to have difficulties establishing and maintaining healthy relationships. Inconsistent emotional support, attention, closeness and real nurturing from parents or caregivers can lead to chronic stress, anxiety and fear. Death of someone close, being abandoned by a parent or being forced to act as adults in childhood are premier causes of abandonment trauma.
Once abandoned, people with abandonment trauma live in fear of being abandoned again. To avoid being abandoned, they often push people away before those people can abandon them. The fear of someone abandoning them is so strong that they purposefully sabotage relationships. They may also do the opposite and cling to people in a codependent manner, even if the relationship is unhealthy. The fear of being alone is a real threat.
There are many signs of abandonment, including anxiety, depression and distrust. Another may be developing relationships quickly, but not committing to and/or maintaining healthy boundaries. They can act in opposite ways such as sticking with unhealthy relationships or codependency, or completely avoiding people or situations where rejection, separation and isolation are possible. Exhibiting patterns of being out of emotional control and panic are also related to the potential loss of key people. Abandonment issues may even result in avoiding physical contact with anyone.
The core issue may be a lack of emotional connection. The emotional needs of the abandoned individual are not satisfactorily met, which manifests as not feeling heard or seen. Often, they feel dismissed, unappreciated, undervalued or even unwanted. These abandonment fears are deeply rooted in their psyche. Another core issue may be low self-esteem. Experiences with others early in life determines self-esteem. Children look to others to understand their value and how they’re perceived. They need unconditional love and to feel wanted. If treated poorly or neglected, they do not feel worthy.
There’s many issues for people that experience abandonment trauma to overcome. Erasing the energetic imprint, or energetic memory, in the layers of each chakra is a novel way to release the core issues.
Dr. Anne Deatly offers a complimentary Ultimate Breakthrough Session. For more information, call 201-925-1046 or email Anne.Deatly@gmail.com.
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